I can't believe it's been 30 days since we started the HCG diet. I lost a total of 13 lbs. I haven't been this size in a very long time. I am happy with how I look and feel.
I am very nervous about gaining the weight back and losing everything I've worked so hard to attain. But mostly I'm afraid of abusing food. I want to be present and feel my feelings and I don't want to run and hide behind food. The problem for me is that I don't always know I'm doing it. I really need to practice being present and listening to my body and how I feel.
I'm at the lake with Chris and 3 other couples. Usually at the lake we eat very poorly. We eat lots of chocolate and other fattening foods. This time we are being healthy or healthier then in the past. Yesterday I over ate. I ate good food but I still ate to much. It freaked me out a little. I went to bed not happy with the way I felt or how I ate. I felt very full. My tummy hurt. I'm sure I over ate. I'm trying hard not to beat myself up. This is a learning process.
This morning I had coffee and went of a mountain bike ride with Chris. It was fun. It was in the rain. Afterwards we got in the hot tub. I hadn't eaten and I didn't know what to eat. It's hard for me when I'm not following a specific eating plan. Left to my own devices I'm unsure of what to do. I don't turst myself to make good choices. I am learning to trust my choices. One Day At A Time.
No comments:
Post a Comment